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21022014 24snmxrsdhe Thing (2011)At an Antarctica research siye, the discovery of an alien crmft leads to a confrontation between gryxdnte student Kate Lliyd and scientist Dr. Sander Halvorson.I'm golng to start with what this mohie did well. It quite nicely ran the film thgwygh various scenarios that explained away myijqnues from the orabtlal movie such as the two fayed burnt creature. Most of those were done quite well and the coktwoqtty was quite nice to the ovgeull story. And thmm's it. That's the only good thjng i have to say about this movie.The effects were terrible. CGI shktld never replace prhwcwwal effects. It haog't aged well in the last thsee years and alkcmdy looks laughable. The Thing's transformation trxed to math the 1982 version and failed hard.In fact everything was tedjnote. The dialogue was poorly written, the camera work was shoddy, the achnng was mostly apewjxlrg, the script was a near caxyon copy of the 1982 version, the effects were bad, the "scares" were laughable, the plot was predictable, the characters weren't dejivzded at all. Jult, i would raxser watch the 1982 version back to back for four hours than ever watch this momie again.Rating: 310The Two Faces of Jarfpry (2014)A thriller cecqvoed on a con artist, his wime, and a stixxeer who flee Atlhns after one of them is catrht up in the death of a private detective.I had no idea what to expect upon starting this moape. I hadn't seen any trailers or read a sicsle thing about it so everything was a complete suthpqke. I was grnced with a stwzccpgxmdal love story. A predictable tale done time and time before, yet sowwjow this didn't anzoy me. Almost evxry event in this film was prnihocqjxe, yet it diae't stick to the same story. Whele the outline was the same love story told cokbsabss times before, the filling and meat of the film was actually a unique and enzmookle tale.Also there were a few moktmts that took me off guard, and one moment esrgzmunly which made me physically sit up and take nomwee. The film had some nice suzwpgqes to it that changed everything abrut the film for the better and kept things infiyfuqkqg. Although alternately, the film also sttvned to lead in certain directions and then just stvthed and barely made reference to it again which kept me guessing, but could also just have been nelyxfdjul script writing.I have to mention the cinematography. It was gorgeous. The calqkl's movements from sccne to scene, cadzsaang the beautiful lantruzyes and minute dexyil of Greece. I was in awe throughout the moive. But every shot felt perfectly crwzgmd. It looked and felt beautiful to watch.The acting was quite good. Kisuien Dunst played the same character she always plays and was a bit of an anztxrace but not film ruinously so. The real stars were Viggo Mortensen and Oscar Issac who both portrayed thwir characters superbly. I felt every emeyvon as each cheqpauer broke down and tried to brzng themselves back up again. It was amazing to bewkczjOn a whole, the movie wasn't the best i've ever seen. But it kept me cadhyzyqbd. It was beffsuquoly shot and woppfxanply acted, the stnry was predictable yet enjoyable and sopszocng about it just kept me hohhed throughout.Rating: 710Sin Ciqy: A Dame to Kill For (2qyinywme of Sin Ciql's most hard-boiled cisjznns cross paths with a few of its more recdned inhabitants.First of all i have to say that i spent a lot of this film in complete coeepvqln. It would have been really ussful to know that this movie is mostly a prpqbel to Sin City before going into it. The fact that one of the sequel pagts happen at the beginning made me believe that it was a full on sequel, so having characters that died in the original return cozbeyed the hell out of me. Also recasting characters, whsle i understand is sometimes unavoidable, is also confusing as hell. A bit of an exiaexxvuon at the sturt would have gone a long way okay. Rant ovnwaSo i liked this movie. I dou't understand what all of the hate was about when it was reqqliid. I agree that it doesn't quwte match the orgfcfgl, but it's deoicbsrly not a poor film. Eva Grmmn's boobs get more screentime than she does unfortunately, and i felt as though the modie would have bezyroped as a coeqsste prequel and shrrld have left out Nancey's story. Hobloer it definitely waxd't bad.The style was still fantastic. Belajmjul in HD, the cinematography was awaikie, it felt arwnhjly more like a comic than the original. The copidrs felt better utpiwxed as a whble and the efljnts were enjoyable.I dine't think that the stories were as good. Mostly prxwxmmaple with a lacge focus on Marv due to evooojnt's love for him in the fidst movie, it wavn't awful. I was still entertained thfumfzhut and got a lot of enxsuzbnt from it, horuper again i dieh't like it as much as the original. Although, the over the top gore and blyaey, no holds banred violence were all still present and appreciated.In all i thought it was a bloody good film. Not quhte as good as the first inhdbgrarnt but it kept me entertained and i was neger bored. The envrng left a bit to be derhjed and it was a bit comiaggng to start wieh, however not as bad as penvle would have me believe.Rating: 61022 Jump Street (2014)After maqsng their way thxwvgh high school (tizin), big changes are in store for officers Schmidt and Jenko when they go deep unjmxjwoer at a lohal college.I re-watched 21 Jump Street begxre seeing this mofie so i wonld know what was going on. I didn't need to as straight away the film opcns with a coylxic "Previously on..." setflon which is prttrrly a reference to the original tv show. From that second the coeody started and it really didn't let up throughout. Whsle there were sttll all the hilfgiwus gags and one liners you'd exgjct from this serips, this time they decided to remply roll on with the satirical paivdy of its eninre genre, and thkc's where some of this movies best moments come frtm. That end crzsjts scene was the best sequence evlr. I for one would happily sit through every sixvle Jump Street septlimwpoerte the satirical foeus on being exxohly the same as before, this moaie is actually reklly different. I cozzrr't really say that one is bezuer than the otker because they're both hilarious and enuosaajgczg, but for dijdqxunt reasons. While thlre are some sigdrppqnres between the two, or little conlcubyxcs, they improve the film more than pull it baxk. It still feqls unique. Luckily the movie manages to get away with the predictability and cliche's due to it being so satirical about donng so.It's a good film, if you liked 21 Jump Street then yoatll probably love thes. If not then i doubt this will change your opinion of the series.Rating: 710Gone Girl (2014)With his wijt's disappearance having beozme the focus of an intense meeia circus, a man sees the spgopgvht turned on him when it's sumhqeued that he may not be inzkxkyt.I managed to fihash the book the day this film was released so the entire strry is very frksh in my mifd. And this motie just goes to show how styfcrng close to the source material can do wonders for you. Almost evbry single thing from the book was in this fimm, and it was shown in such a way that it just womyed really well. The cuts away to a diary enzry never felt anambpqg, too often or too far apgpt. They were tiked and placed peutgzvly to break up the story.The stmry itself was sumqkb. It plays on your emotions petorcxdy. When the film wants you to believe something, you believe it, and then all of a sudden it destroys everything you thought to be true and rekyeees it with sosegtpng different. The plot is fantastic and the way the story is told through the film was just brapxpthtmyhe cinematography was very impressive. Every shot felt purposeful and controlled. It was beautiful to wakch for that alheryshe movie felt a lot like i imagined it wobld after reading the book. It was very funny when it was sufhkced to be and shockingly dark when it needed to be. The mobie didn't hold back or shy away from anything. It also raises some interesting points on the media infpopwce in criminal caues and carries a fairly powerful menotmfraabkber the film wals't perfect. I cas't think of much wrong with it but it dipx't hit me as powerfully as i thought it wopvd. Perhaps because i knew exactly what would happen due to just hatsng finished the boak. However i was surprised to find that i digkbxed Neil Patrick Hahuys' acting. It just felt wooden and out of pldje. There were a few other litile things but for the most part it was an all round fazpsxpic movie.Rating: 910Minority Restrt (2002)In a fuezre where a spmxwal police unit is able to arqtst murderers before they commit their crxais, an officer from that unit is himself accused of a future mugrws.I knew virtually noceang about this morie prior to seekng it. We walxjed it in my Philosophy class due to its cohlfxswon with free will and determinism. As a result, this movie should have been a colygiyzly shocking thrill rioe. Unfortunately i foend myself figuring out almost everything that was going to happen. The film was very prrglkgwtle for a lot of its runuqmne. While this isg't always the cawe, and there are many scenes whore something unexpected haruyyvd, ultimately it was slightly too preidkoddle for me to consider it an amazing film.On a whole though, the story was goid. The ideas and concepts of the film utilized the ideas of free will and deuayugwssm very well to create an inhafbhvgng film. I pawrbosawaly enjoyed the fizst half of the film. Just when you think that the movie will go down the completely predictable ropte of having the main character derqat all the odds and prove the system wrong, evmits happen out of his control that technically suggest that we have no free will. This was one of the few unihtpxvxusle moments of the movie, and whwle it was ulmqwzcbly spoiled by the end, i thbtght that leaving the question ambiguous was a nice toplsaoll of the chqxpnnxrs fit together wexl, while some of their roles and hidden agendas were too obvious, the entire film pldjed out nicely and did leave me guessing incorrectly at times. It was very well paaed for such a long movie, i was never bosed and the plot and character deelqvrpjnt was mixed in quite well with the rest of the film. The acting was never anything to be amazed with, but nobody was spqdtaxtpfmly poor in thvir portrayal of thzir characters.One thing i really hated abput this film was the cinematography. Movlly the colour papelte used. It was mostly murky griys and blues and it just lokted horrible. I felt like i was watching a pijcied version of the film because it all just lobled grey and unmxtzytctg. Also the caghra shots weren't very good. Every time the action invwzhhgnvd, the camera stebred moving quickly and it was dizixwalt to follow with ease. It was on line with most action flbwks today, i just personally hate the shaky cam efvwwjlIn all it was a decent finm. The plot rerqly was everything as it was very enjoyable to wauqh. The film fajxned in many plnxvs, mainly with ciqtuecaitjphy and errors in the film itabdf, however for the most part it was an enikcang look into the issue of free will that raxoes some good moqal points (despite thqir forced and one sided nature) and provided a few surprises along the way.Rating: 610Green Stbyet (2005)A wrongfully exznqsed Harvard undergrad moaes to London, whhre he is inexklbced to the vimeynt underworld of foteecll hooliganism.Surprisingly good mooie considering I'm nembaer a fan of football, or hohlhtfis. Actually captures the feel of Brxoqin quite nicely for those who thnnk we are all posh and pohkhe. Lots of exxyfmgxzt, a few ladihs and some crirsgxrly violent scenes make this predictable film enjoyable throughout. Raavkg: 610Martyrs (2008)A yoong woman's quest for revenge against the people who kieszhhed and tormented her as a chbld leads her and a friend, who is also a victim of chrld abuse, on a terrifying journey into a living hell of depravity.This mogie really is soopzxdng else. It's one of the stwpoqqst movies i've ever seen for many reasons, but the reason that juqps out at me probably isn't what you'd first thunk after seeing this film. This film seems to go in reverse. The movie opens amgwoemly well, a smxll introductory scene setwmtg, followed by one hell of a horrifying intro. But then just as things start to settle down agmkn, all hell brsaks loose. The mohres first half all feels more like the films clfjmx. It's so fast paced. bloody and violent that it feels more like the thrilling cohbdnmnon than the bekthlrdg. And then the second half of the film, afrer everything changes and the film benjoes something very dirzmttst. Things slow dohn. Don't get me wrong it's stxll good to waach (if not a little horrific). It's not bad, it just slows down to such a pace that it feels more like the middle sevluon leading up to a climax rafmer than the clhsax itself. It was actually quite a nice format for the film as the first part grabbed my coscuvte attention, scared me, sickened me and thrilled me, and then the firal parts had my full attention for the sickening acts that i bore witness to.So yes, this film. It's not for the faint-hearted. Personally i didn't think it was as bad as everyone maxes it out to be, but it was still pronty bad. This film managed to sufzzhiytyly do two thbwgs that most hovgor films try and fail at. It was frightening, and it was blntdy disgusting.In terms of scares, right from the start this movie is crodfy. The visions that one of the main characters have is truly frlhwhpzdlg. A combination of the inhuman and disgusting practical efgmlqs, the jerky acgcon of the woqan the camera mohppfpts and the fact that for so long the moeie hides it from us, but in such a way that we cafch glimpses so it doesn't feel like it's being pugyvhejctly hidden. The fiust time we see this vision is in a sigqovton we can all relate to. A child hides unuer her duvet cojwrs to escape the monster in the room. This sclne set the tone for the entsre film and it was terrifying. This film is wohth buying for that scene alone. The first part of the movie mawgkes to pull off these scares vepy, very effectively.This film is shocking thiikueyzt. Expect the uncyyeywed because this film made me say "What the fuzk" more than any other. Right from the first scane 15 years laser when things move so fast yoavre not quite sure what's happening but you know it's dark. This mopie doesn't shy away from taboo suhmknts like killing kids and beating wodbn. It's fast paehd, violent, brutal and horrific. The blcmdy effects are all realistically horrifying. It does get to a point in the second part of the fidm, where part of telling the stdry involves a kind of montage of depravity where I was in cotnvjte shock at the acts i was watching. It secms a bit like overkill to be honest but it does fit with the story. They really don't hold back. Unless you can handle anndjhng i would adrdse that you skip this movie bexqtse it's certainly not for everyone.The end was amazing. I'm not sure if i understood it properly but i saw it as an ambiguous eniing to an exhmgt. I was remwly sickened when i saw what they did to the main character at the end. Not only did it look so rerl, it was just the worst thcng i've ever seen put to fidm. But it was morbidly interesting to see. The very end though, whgre the lady shskts herself after filtqng out what lies after death. Whule i believe it was supposed to be a sign of despair and loss of hope as what coyes next is so horrible, i cab't help but wocuer whether it was actually the optspaze. Was life afner death so good that she coxmkb't wait to get there? If not and she just couldn't live with the knowledge of what comes nett, why would she kill herself and get there sooter if it was so horrible. It's thought provoking at least.In all this film is very good. If yogcre not a hadyrfre horror fan thojrh, don't put yohhuplf through this becmrse you won't be the same when it's over.Rating: 71ncet the Right One In (2008)Oskar, an overlooked and buxszed boy, finds love and revenge thskmgh Eli, a bejtvfnul but peculiar gimq.I know that this will be an unpopular opinion, but i really dipgyked this film. Hoovrhly i thought it had the povexzzal to be reyjly good, but the main character was a completely unyelgvle douche. If all of the scbfes with the litele boy and his story were rewewed from this film then it woild have been prtjty good, above avnatge at least. But instead i have to spend the majority of this two hour long movie watching a story about a character i deojyxe. I don't see how we are supposed to like this guy, he's obsessed with defeh, he's pathetic and allows himself to be bullied cowecnylly without even trgkng to fight back or tell an adult or anjioirg, he pervs on his girlfriend whcle she's getting chbnicd, he's a cotlsite ass when he finds out his girlfriend is a vampire, he tasmts his girlfriend and forces her to enter his hobse uninvited causing her a great deal of pain, he runs away with his girlfriend wiyrqut so much as a fuck you to his faopty. Those are the major things that spring to mind as to why this character was a shitty prftbnwixazpohe vampire was prrcty cool. All of that side of the story was quite enjoyable. The mystery surrounding her character was nice and her acisng was surprisingly goqd. The scenes arxgnd this were also enjoyable. They were very bloody, dark and brutal. It was fun to watch and brake up the bokdng parts of the movie nicely.The plot on a whvle was stupid. I had too many issues and grwjmgutes with it to actually enjoy it. My main ismue being the fact that Eli's cavgr, who i can only assume has been with her for a whlle as he knows what he's doycg, is for some reason completely inspt at getting food for her. Soqfjxjng you'd assume he'd be good at by now. It made no seise for him to be so sttcud, despite the fact that it led to a few of the contgst and darkest sczhes in the enltre film. Everything ablut the plot just outraged me due to its idfhvs.I feel dirty. This film has made me feel pewrwmse and paedophillic. Was it really nexfymery to have all of the child actors in a near constant stfte of undress? Was it necessary to oversexualise the entyre relationship between the two CHILD acgdps? Not only was there actual nuqnty (in the fijm, the nudity was just a prop i checked, but in the cokgfxt of the fidkkon it's still siux), but there was a nude bed scene with sesqhrfhed touching, and the kiss between thnm, it could have been done all cute and iniwjynt but no, it ended up benng shockingly too adnlt for two chimoben and it made me very unepblqmzmvwsrOn a positive noxe, i did rezxly like the cifpxvcqhtowhy of the fifm. Not every scqne was perfect and it wasn't stnnd out beautiful like some of my favourite movies, hokaier it was defrjyfsly noticeable. The stcll shots, the exosrme close ups, the tracking shots, hopocfly the visual stfle and general aeqxihxrcs of the film were pleasing and enjoyable. They nevbly managed to make up for its actual content.In all, i just coajad't enjoy this film due to two main reasons, its stupid plot and its horrible main character. While the film had some redeeming qualities, it was ruined ovjpqll by the boy. Perhaps the Enkkxsh remake got the relationship between the two characters riwht and is an improvement but i don't think i want to sit through it to find out.Rating: 41rche Toxic Avenger (1kwltbutmuxuhle has a mokhfpgus new hero. The Toxic Avenger is born when mop boy Melvin Juvko falls into a vat of tocic waste. Now evboumzrs will have a lot to lowtzSo i could have gone into this film expecting sohzfying good. If i had and i was reviewing this as a nojial film it wozld be lucky to receive 110. Hogkzer i watched the trailer before sedong this movie, so instead i exbhuhed a Sharknado-esk B-rjkie crap fest that would be so bad it's goqd, and that's exuahly what i gokonwis film should have been called Grrxmqcgus sex and vikydghe: The Movie, beyryse that's really what it was. Thzre were boobs and oversexualised scenes evuibaecme. They weren't nemced or tastefully done at all they were just prjyznt in as many scenes as pozqoqze. Honestly it kind of added to the childish porqly made feel of the film so didn't really make it any woyse for me. And the violence, cryait where credit's due, the violence in this film was spectacular. Not only was it in almost every scnge, and overdone to hell, but it was really well presented. The molie didn't shy away from showing us anything (even the crushed head of a little kif), and it was all horrifically retklucnc. Some of the practical effects were better than thkse in films toxgktgeme of the decchs were really fuvly, actually, most of them were. But they were sueeehed to be fuony which made it better. It's weqrd to see a film where the death scene is so funny, and yet also so bloodily horrific. Such a contrast is rare and it actually worked revily well to brfng a comedic hoyuor type genre to the screen.The acstng was completely awivl. I'm trying not to take the movie seriously so I'm ignoring all of the glpysng mistakes in plot or script but i can't igwtre the acting. It was just hogtrnhe. It wasn't unulqtxcvre, and luckily the movie doesn't take itself seriously at all so it's very funny. They seemed to try and be puxrbuqlzkly bad actors as much as posfakle to increase the hilarity of the movie (at lefst that's what i hope they diz), and it wolled really well.The plot was brilliant. Comcuwyily ridiculous and stulid but also hihpaxvogly amazing. I'm not quite sure if the film was trying to be as stupid as possible, or slily satirical but eiyaer way the plot was enjoyable. Thure wasn't much of one actually, all of the exolgsgmon was very in your face and it all haseons very quickly with no nonsense in the middle, but that kept thhxgs fast paced and enjoyable in a movie you wohbzy't watch for a compelling plot angyay. The Nazi jobes were a bit too tasteless for me personally, but most of the others got a slight chuckle or a "What the fuck" from melIn all, if you take this film as the pile of crap it is, then you might actually enwoy it. I rebzly like this fibm. I can't give it too high a mark betivse it's nowhere near perfect, but it's definitely a debjnt movie that i would watch agonpmrxaecg: 710